So, I'm officially at the point of "what the hell did i get myself into?!?!" I'm almost done my first day of clear liquids, and I'm just feeling defeated. I can't do this. It's too hard. I'm watching the family eat dinner and then ice cream.... and dammit! Why am i doing this?!?!?!
I'm doing this because i want to. I have to. I'm doing this for me. No more whining! (though i may still sniffle and shed a tear now and then)... I've gotten this far, there's no sense messing it up now. If i "cheat" I'm only screwing up what I've accomplished already. Yep, I'm sure the surgeon wont know if i have a little ice cream, but i would know. This is my chance to change my thoughts and my habits related to my foods.
My day's rations consisted of water (hooray for Propel water), chicken bullion, sugarfree popsicles, and sugarfree jello. I'm hungry. It's not as much a physical hunger as i thought....but my brain wants food NOW. My stomach is a little rumbly, but not too bad. Farther down, though, is another story. I do believe the roofing tar is still in production, though now it's a much thinner mix. And all the deliveries are urgent. TMI, I'm sure, but you wanted to read this...so there =P
Now I'm thinking about going to bed early so i don't want to eat anything anymore. One more day of this. One more. I can do this. I will do this.
I anxiously await your first post-op post! My prayers are with you for a speedy recovery; your wit & wonderful sense of humor will see you through! Terry
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