So, it's noon and I'm only on my 2nd Opti-Fast shake of the day. I got up late. Which means i have to stay up late to drink my quota. **sigh** This is my last day of Opti-Fast and honestly, I will not miss it. It's gotten to the point that I'd rather not drink anything... No matter what flavor of shake i have, it tastes like ass. My tongue is fuzzy. The only prominent taste i can discern is something akin to sucking on pennies. Welcome to ketosis. This fuzz will not come off my tongue. Any attempts to dislodge said fuzz only results in a stronger ass/coppery taste. Water does not help. Brushing teeth/tongue does not help. I'm sure a nice greasy cheeseburger would help, but i can't have one.
After today, it's two days of clear liquids, then nothing after midnight Sunday. I'm reporting to the hospital by 7am on Monday for surgery. I just hope i don't have to kill anyone by then. My brain-hungry is getting annoying. I don't need anything, but i WANT stupid things. Toast. I want toast. Now. But i know that anything i do wrong now will only postpone my surgery. So here I sit.... toastless.
I'm angry. Everyone is making me angry. Everything is making me angry. I am an angry, angry woman. If i wasn't feeling so tired, i might do something irrational. But since i have to get up every two hours to pee, i haven't gotten enough sleep to do anything crazy...
My lovely children get the most of my anger at this point. I want the house clean before i go to the hospital. I have teenagers. I don't expect my house to look Better Homes & Gardens pretty, but damn, could you at least put the dishes in the sink and not pee on the floor?!?! The oldest monster is cooking dinners now so i don't have to. He's also doing dishes and picking up the slack for his brother. I love him. He's still a teenager, but he's a good one most of the time. My youngest... well, he's just angry that I'm home from work...can't wait to get me outta here... Yeah, i love him too.
Maybe its psychosomatic, but I'm exhausted. I have no motivation and a bajillion things to do. But I'm soooo tired. I tried to get my butt moving yesterday and work out a bit, and i fell asleep on the yoga ball. I guess that was a sign. So I'm taking it easy. Still doing laundry and picking up after everyone, but I'm accepting the realization that the house will be messy when i get home from surgery. As long as i have a couch to sleep upright on, i guess I'm okay with that.... and please kids, don't put dirty dishes on me while I'm sleeping...
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