...or a rope, or some stairs... Anything to get out of this seemingly bottomless pit I've been in lately...
According to a bajillion websites, depression is rather common after WLS. I've been reading up on it after realizing that I can't seem to get myself motivated. I've talked to my primary doctor, but since I've had so many revisions, my medication choices are severely limited. I can't take anything with an "extended release" formula, I can't take any medication in a solid form (no pills, no capsules). I haven't had much luck breaking open capsules and mixing the contents with water or soft foods, they usually just come right back up. You would think there would be a larger market for liquid antidepressants...
I've been depressed for a while now. I guess after having so much hospital time and so many complications, depression is to be expected. I've been trying to deal with it, but my patience is wearing thin. I'm starting to get irritated and cranky at my family. My kids are starting to avoid me when I'm upset, and my poor hubby tries to help as much as he can... I feel worse for making them put up with me.
Teenagers get a bad rep, sometimes. They make me crazy, but all in all (especially compared with some of the kids that I've seen come through this house) my kids are awesome. They do chores after some prodding, and ask if they can get me anything... They stay out of trouble. They're good kids.
My hubby as been wonderfully supportive though all of this medical nonsense. He's truly the best guy ever. He's taken off a lot of days from work to take me to doctors appointments and tests and procedures. He makes me tea and brings me a blanket when I'm not feeling well and stuck on the couch... He lets me hug him and cry on his shoulder when I'm in the middle of a depressive fit...
So, if I have a great supportive family at home, why am I still so damn sad? That's the most frustrating thing by far. I know I'm depressed, now what do I do? I'm hoping this is just a phase and it'll pass soon. I've been burying myself in depression websites trying to find an answer. I've been reading a lot of forum posts and responses, looking up statistics, and trying to sift through all the technical jargon on medical websites... I wish I would have done this before I had surgery back in May...
My best answer so far has been that fat cells also store hormones. As the fat cells are diminished, weight is lost, but more hormones are released into your bloodstream. Great, so as long as I'm still loosing weight I'm going to be on constant PMS mode??!!?!?
WLS patients are up to five times more likely to commit suicide than the general population. That is startling. If the percentage is so much higher in WLS patients, why is this never really addressed before surgery? I mean, I am nowhere near THAT depressed. If I was, I'd hope to have the sense to check myself in somewhere...
I'm also in a serious Food Mourning stage. I used to bury my depression with a pint of Ben & Jerry's. Now I have to face my feelings head on. I miss being able to use food as a comfort and a crutch. Now food and I have a tense, iffy relationship at best. I've been Clockwork Orange-d. Food is my violence. Now just the thought of food makes me rather queasy. Viddy well, brother. Viddy well...
According to a bajillion websites, depression is rather common after WLS. I've been reading up on it after realizing that I can't seem to get myself motivated. I've talked to my primary doctor, but since I've had so many revisions, my medication choices are severely limited. I can't take anything with an "extended release" formula, I can't take any medication in a solid form (no pills, no capsules). I haven't had much luck breaking open capsules and mixing the contents with water or soft foods, they usually just come right back up. You would think there would be a larger market for liquid antidepressants...
I've been depressed for a while now. I guess after having so much hospital time and so many complications, depression is to be expected. I've been trying to deal with it, but my patience is wearing thin. I'm starting to get irritated and cranky at my family. My kids are starting to avoid me when I'm upset, and my poor hubby tries to help as much as he can... I feel worse for making them put up with me.
Teenagers get a bad rep, sometimes. They make me crazy, but all in all (especially compared with some of the kids that I've seen come through this house) my kids are awesome. They do chores after some prodding, and ask if they can get me anything... They stay out of trouble. They're good kids.
My hubby as been wonderfully supportive though all of this medical nonsense. He's truly the best guy ever. He's taken off a lot of days from work to take me to doctors appointments and tests and procedures. He makes me tea and brings me a blanket when I'm not feeling well and stuck on the couch... He lets me hug him and cry on his shoulder when I'm in the middle of a depressive fit...
So, if I have a great supportive family at home, why am I still so damn sad? That's the most frustrating thing by far. I know I'm depressed, now what do I do? I'm hoping this is just a phase and it'll pass soon. I've been burying myself in depression websites trying to find an answer. I've been reading a lot of forum posts and responses, looking up statistics, and trying to sift through all the technical jargon on medical websites... I wish I would have done this before I had surgery back in May...
My best answer so far has been that fat cells also store hormones. As the fat cells are diminished, weight is lost, but more hormones are released into your bloodstream. Great, so as long as I'm still loosing weight I'm going to be on constant PMS mode??!!?!?
WLS patients are up to five times more likely to commit suicide than the general population. That is startling. If the percentage is so much higher in WLS patients, why is this never really addressed before surgery? I mean, I am nowhere near THAT depressed. If I was, I'd hope to have the sense to check myself in somewhere...
I'm also in a serious Food Mourning stage. I used to bury my depression with a pint of Ben & Jerry's. Now I have to face my feelings head on. I miss being able to use food as a comfort and a crutch. Now food and I have a tense, iffy relationship at best. I've been Clockwork Orange-d. Food is my violence. Now just the thought of food makes me rather queasy. Viddy well, brother. Viddy well...
Prozac comes in liquid form; I have 2 pints to spare! Best wishes, Terry
ReplyDeleteLOL, Terry, did Prozac work for you? My GP suggested it to me, but I was a pharmacy tech for years so I have this whole perception of the people that were on prozac that came into the pharmacy...
ReplyDeleteProzac is a lifesaver. I started taking it for severe PMS (I wanna shoot somebody syndrome). Now I'm so over that! Took the liquid for a week, following my sleeve, but can again handle the capsules. Heck, I seem so normal, if I waltzed into your pharmacy, you'd swear I was picking up the Rx for a friend. In this day and age, nobody should have to suffer from depression...Or FROM someone with depression!
ReplyDelete